One Foot In Front Of The Other

So I'm starting this post off with some advice I was given from someone who I truly look up to, and it's simple....All you have to do is get up every morning, and just put one foot in front of the other to get through. I am trying just as hard as I can to do that today. Work has been especially stressful lately, and I am lucky to have the people that I do have to keep me calm through the day. And I keep telling myself, this is just a job, it is not life or death. And yet I still am sitting here daily criticizing everything that I do. 

They want us to fit in this cookie cutter world that I just have never fit into. What I loved about my job in Virginia, was I could be me. I could express myself while also staying professional. I could be who I wanted to be, whether it artistic, creative, and outspoken. Sometimes I feel like just another link in a very large chain here. Just a small part of the bigger picture....I know that this job is a great job, and it pays great, and most days I really do have a great time! But when I am asked to dampen my individuality, it just is hard to swallow. I have always been one to express myself for who I am. I know that my parents are not always happy with the decisions that I have made when I do choose to express myself (sorry Mommy and Daddy), but it's just a hard pill to swallow. 

I know corporate America IS a cookie cutter world, where everyone looks like Carol Brady and Mike Brady, and we have to look the part we want, not the part we have. But can't I look the part I want while still showing self expression? Can't I look the part without sacrificing my creativity? I experienced Art School at 100%. I took each person I met and learned them and loved them. It opened my eyes to all the different kinds of people in the world, and that even the Vice President of the school, covered in tattoos and piercings, could come off as professional. Times are changing....I'm not saying that everyone should be getting full sleeve tattoos, but a little self expression or piercing are acceptable. 

I know this page has been kind of a long rant of anger, but I just am having a hard time all around. I want to be me, the me I found in art school. The me who was picked on in grade school and high school for being weird, but accepted and celebrated for who I was when I got to art school. I feel like that person is slipping away from me, and I don't want to lose her in this boxed in work life I have. I always told mysellf when I got out of college I would take my nose ring out because it would be just a part of my life, but I realized it became a part of who I was, so I kept it. This is the first time that I have been told that it is offensive and I need to get a clear filler? But the tattoos on coworkers necks and wrists are just fine? I am by no means against them having showing tattoos, but why discriminate against piercings that people hardly even notice anyway. I guess for now I will just have to continue to be myself out of work, and keep the Carol Brady act up for when I'm in work. Sacrifices have to be made when you want something....I don't necessarily like them, but they need to be made. 

I have been going to the gym. I have been getting my calories in which is good. I have a lot of calls to make and people to see on Monday. But I am making progress on getting to some solutions to the problem...but stressing over all of this isn't going to help. So I will try to just relax, fit in, and be creative on my own time.