Day 130

Good Evening everyone. Is it completely ridiculous that I decided to decorate my house for Christmas today??? We put our tree up, and I will tell you, I think it's because I am so sad to be alone for the holidays this year. As happy and blessed as I am to get to spend it with Hayden and Alayna, it will be my first year without my mom, dad, sister, brother, and nephews. It will be weird. I love my family more than words can even amount to, so it will be strange not to spend this time of year with them. I told Hayden today that it's not that I want Christmas to last longer, it's that the tree is really just a symbol of family, love, laughter, and a true feeling of joy. So of course I want it up as soon as possible because really....it just makes me happy!!

After I started talking about the holidays, I began to get very sad. I took a hard look at my situation right now, and realize that all the friends I have...live very far away. I haven't really found anyone down here, and it is really starting to bring me down. I don't have people to hang out with on the weekends, or girls night with my friends anymore....I have Hayden and Alayna. So I think if I could just find some friends maybe the holidays wouldn't feel so lonely!!!

Alright, sob story over....I can't believe how late it is, I'm sorry for writing so late again everyone!!! I will talk with all of you tomorrow!!!